Home stretch

by Mrs. Smith on June 29, 2020

So hm.

Facebook break was supposed to end in a few days.

I vacillate wildly between “Oh, man, taking a huge break from that was the best idea ever,” to “ARE WE THERE YET??? I miss you!!!”

But then, seeing the end of this break on the horizon, do you know what God did?

They went and told me to take 2 weeks off social media altogether. Get off screens, for reals, especially during the day around my kids. Sink into my real life here even more.

Gah. Okay. I’ve been pondering on this topic for a bit anyway. I’m sure I need it. There are always Reasons for these directives. My break from Facebook has been good for me and it’s gone waaaay better than the last time I tried a month off.

The way God kicked me off Facebook right before the BLM thing blew up, though… I admit, I’m kinda like… Okay, July, what’s next? Should I be worried? lol.

But for the sake of indulging my “ARE WE THERE YET?” streak, let’s explore something…

What do I miss about my social media-ing?

I miss the connection to people in Facebook groups for specific audiences like PTSD, DID, spirituality, empath-ness, and other stuff I’m into. I get to help and be helped there in pretty happy ways.

Given that my blog audience is teeeeeny tiny, I’m going to be vague here and I don’t care. If you know, you know. If you don’t know and you’d like to, reach out to me and I’ll happily tell you privately.

I miss the little group I created about DID Integration. The DID audience is sacred to me. These people are so so so special. It’s holy ground… and here are experiences I’ve had that people in that group understand better than most.

I’ve had different people suggest that I didn’t actually have DID. Which is fine. Based on where I am now, it might not have been an accurate diagnosis – because DID doesn’t usually work out and heal like mine did. I have come to a place where I don’t really care what you call it. I own it no matter its label, and I love it for helping me survive the un-survive-able.

Speaking of integration….

Sometimes I look at where I am now and I… it’s… well, it’s pretty miraculous, I guess you could say. It really is. It’s been… how long now?

<asks Google>

It’s been 140 days since the radical brain upgrade.

This is the part where it feels like the dust has settled and we have a new normal emerging.

A new normal. During this weird-pandemic / civil-rights-movement-reboot.

Normal.

<snort laugh>

This is also the part where Mr Smith and I watch a TV series that ends up having TWO different plot elements where characters end up saying VERBATIM things I’ve said about the integration process. What in the freaking heck, are you serious? It’s the kind of stuff that would-could also be said by anyone dealing with rocky or intense trauma recovery… But what these TV characters go through is more extreme than what happens in the real world, and their perspectives TOTALLY match the weird extremeness of what I went through.

So I think the punchline of this post is basically…

that the Divine Orchestrators of our lives have a pretty wild sense of humor.

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