Running out of ziplock baggies

by Mrs. Smith on January 4, 2018

Setting: Living room couches.
Props: Laptop and assorted minions running in and out.
Situation: Placing the bi-monthly SamsClub order online so we can waltz in at some point tomorrow and trade our children’s inheritances for, like, half the store.

Mr Smith:
Do we need ziplocks?

Mrs Smith:

Mr Smith:
So, just sandwich sized? Or quart sized, too?

Mrs Smith:
Meh, just little ones.

Quart size? How you gonna fit the judge, jury, and witnesses in them tiny little baggies?

Mrs Smith:

Mr Smith:


Dad. Come on. Quart… “Court”… It’s funny!

Mr Smith, deadpan:
No. No, it’s not. Maybe if you were making a joke about how many rocks you could fit in that quarts-sized baggie, then it would be funny.

C & Mrs Smith:

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