Sleep Training Myself
I’m in the middle of sleep training.
Sleep-training the baby?
No. Not really. He’s doing alright, all things considered.
The two year old?
Nope. He’s made the transition into the toddler bed without too much fuss over the last few weeks. Good job, little man!
I’m in the middle of sleep-training myself.
I shall explain, and since it’s my blog and I can ramble if I want to, I’m going to tell you the long story.
There are two kinds of people in the world;
introverts
Like him.
and
extroverts.
Like them.
Well, okay. There might be people that fall in the middle, but I think they’re rare.
Since reading “Raising Your Spirited Child,” this is how I define those two labels:
Introverts: Get their energy from doing things by themselves. I’m not talking about people who come across as being afraid of others, “wallflowers” or the like. I just mean that for “introverts” (as that books defines them) being alone = energizing. They may enjoy being with people – big groups, little groups, etc. They may even be gregarious & outgoing! But they need alone-time to “recharge.”
Extroverts: Are rather the opposite. They need to be with people. Not all the time, and not like they freak out if they’re left by themselves, but they need to be with someone to “recharge.” That’s where they get their energy.
Disclaimer: Yes, of course everyone needs both time alone and time with others. Nevertheless…
This is such an interesting concept to me. An introverted child, for example, might act up and be naughty for the express purpose of being sent to time-out — so he or she can be alone! They won’t think about it in those terms, but their subconscious knows that getting sent to their room will give them time to recharge and feel better. As the parent of an introverted child, you need to look for cues that they’re getting overwhelmed or overdone, and facilitate some down time for them.
Another side-note. Or rather, a side-question. What kinds of dynamics happen in a home where one spouse is introverted and the other is extroverted? Compromises happen, and if they don’t… it’s not pretty.
So… any guesses as to “what” I am?
Hard to tell in a blog, isn’t it? It’s not a fair question to those of you who haven’t met me.
I’m an introvert.
Always have been. Likely always will, as much as I love being with friends, hanging out with people, etc. Eventually it wears me down and I need time to myself. It’s part of why I love reading so much. If I get sucked into a book, I can be alone even in a crowded room.
In almost all the family-home-videos I’ve seen of our Christmas mornings, I’m there in the middle of all the holiday cheer… with my nose in a book. I used to think, “Ha! What a bookworm!” Now I know I was just finding my happy-quiet-place without actually leaving the party.
Hm… So… What was I saying?
(scroll up… okay, got it)
Sleep training.
Why I need to sleep-train myself. Right.
Not because I have a hard time falling asleep. Thankfully I’ve not been cursed with that problem.
It’s because
I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED time by myself!
Need it! Every day! Me me me me! By myself!!! No children playing with me, hanging on me, begging me for something, needing me to do something, etc, etc. With kids this little and in such abundant supply, it’s a wonder I can find time to brush my teeth and my hair on the same day. (Nod to Sis. Andrews!)
We’ve been doing “quiet time” in the afternoons where supposedly I get a break, and that helps a lot, too. It’s still not completely giving me that introvert-time I crave.
By the time they’re in bed at night (and it’s usually somewhere around 7pm), I’m exhausted. Yes, even with their 7pm bedtime. Somehow the alone time at the end of the day when I’m super-drained just isn’t as refreshing as it is when I can still think in complete sentences.
So even though I kinda hate to do it, I’m getting up early.
Way early. Early enough that in the horrid event that one of them decides to get up, too, I can say, “Sorry kid, you aren’t getting up at 5am. Back to bed with you.”
Alright, you caught me. I’m getting up at something more like 5:30. Ish.
Thus far things have gone well. I get pretty physically tired by the late afternoon, but it’s worth it for me as an individual and for me as a Mommy. Think of the difference between waking up to a showered-and-dressed, happy Mommy in the kitchen making breakfast…
vs.
pulling a groggy, cranky Mommy out of bed cuz you’re hungry and the “creation” you tried to make turned out yucky.
Which one would you prefer?
PS: Thanks, John, for being my personal alarm-clock. Alarms I can ignore. Music won’t even wake me up. But someone rubbing my feet?… Now THAT’S a great way to start the day.
Isn’t a shower before the kiddos get up the best way to start the day? I was so going to write a post about my 6am wake up time…but you beat me to it. And, less our blogs become too much the same…I guess I’ll just give you a big –
AMEN!
Aw, shucks. And you’ve been sleep-training yourself longer than I have. Well, oh well.
Except its not really working right now with the lack of sleep training in some little person I know…so you’re actually ahead of me (not that it matters who is ahead of whom).
Kudos to you Mrs. Smith! I find that I do much better throughout the day if I get up early (5AM). The day always goes better. Since the weeks and months have past since I started my early rise I’ve been less tired throughout the day. I’ve found that for me (everyone is different) if I go to bed at 10:30 I feel great at 5. If I go to bed earlier or much after 11 them I’m to tired or I’ve slept to much and I just don’t have the ability to yank myself out of bed. Hiding the alarm clock under the treadmill really helps to get me up. I have to stumble, walk and try to see to turn it off!
Keep up the good work. Enjoy that introvert time, I’m right with you on that!
I’m looking forward to this transition being behind me. Your post on sleeping helped me bite this bullet. I should’ve referenced it. Hm. Maybe I’ll tack in on here…
Now I have visions of a sleepyhead stepping on the treadmill – which cleverly is programmed to start when the alarm clock goes off – and immediately being forced to begin exercise in the morning while still struggling to wake up and find and destroy the alarm clock, all while not getting thrown off the pace-increasing treadmill, maybe with an incline thrown in for good measure.
Maybe that’s not exactly how it works, but it sounds like fun!
I have such a hard time getting up right now! I am still nursing twice a night, but I STILL find when I get up early the day is better.
When I am so tired in the morning, and I don’t want to get up, I say to myself, “I can always take a nap later.” Even though I know that will probably never happen, the idea of it helps me to shuffle into the shower.
I haven’t gotten the nap, yet, but somehow, the Lord invigorates me enough to get through the day. Thanks, also, Deanna, for the advice about finding what time is best to go to bed…and here’s to hiding the alarm clock!
Way to go! Sleep training yourself is MUCH harder than children. I’m an introvert myself. Aren’t all bloggers? Otherwise we would just have a million friends in real life instead of on line, right?
-laughing…-
Good point!
I already get up at six to go exercise, but the kids are up too soon after. Maybe I need to get up earlier . . . I will consider this. Perhaps I’ll have time to update my blog more often, or finish my book.
The possibilities are endless.
Uh oh. You’re working on your book still? I haven’t touched mine in ages, in spite of adding 3 hours to my day by getting my duff out of bed. Now I need to get my brain out of bed, I s’pose…